i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize