i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
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