Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
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