Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I think I just shit out all my problems.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
