She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
