From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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