The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
