You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
