ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
