Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I forget how to act sober
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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