two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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