Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
