I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
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