It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
