sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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