Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
