i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
