I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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