So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
