I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
