Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
