i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
