I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
