I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
