It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
