i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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