Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
A+ Viking dick
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
