and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
It was like getting head from an anaconda
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
