he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
