i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
