When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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