Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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