so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
