My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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