So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
