why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
