Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize