Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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