i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
No subtext here. People are naked.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
My life is pants optional.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
