she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
