what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize