So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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