Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Can I color on your dick again?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
