**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
