Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
