Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
