I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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