Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
