Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
