So drunk, too bad you don't want this
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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