Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i dont even know how to be here
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
i've created a new STD.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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