Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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